Chocobo Saga
by Skeleto
Summary: A story about 3 men and a chocobo. Not much to say, besides read and review! (PG-13 for a couple uses of adult language.)
1. Theft!

Note: I do not own FFVIII, FFVII or it's characters, but I wouldn't mind to (BIG clue, Squaresoft...).  
  
The Chocobo Saga  
  
Chapter 1: Theft!  
  
Skeleto: Meet the champion chocobo racer of the world, Cloud Strife!  
Squall: Hey, what about me? I wanna be the champ!  
Skeleto: Shut up, Squall. You come in later.  
Cloud: Hello! I'm the champ, not Squall!  
Skeleto: Yes, yes, we all know. And also meet Cloud's faithful chocobo, Choco.  
Cloud: Isn't it an original name?  
Squall: I wanna be the CHAMP!  
Skeleto and Cloud: SHUT UP!  
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Skeleto: One day, Cloud is training with Choco for the upcoming Regional Championship.  
Cloud: I'm training! Lalala, trainin' with my Chocobo.  
Skeleto: Little does the blissful moron know, but evil is about to strike!  
Squall: Who's evil? And I still wanna be the champ!  
Skeleto: That's it! You're evil! You're the dangerous creature of death, deceit, and the theivery of hot dogs!  
Zell: That's where they went?  
Skeleto: You're not in this story, go away. As I was saying, Squall, the evil freak of nature that he is, wants to become champ.  
Squall: Hey, I'm no freak of nature!  
Skeleto: Shut the fuck up, and to your job!  
Squall: Ah, bite me.  
Skeleto: Now, as Squall wants to be a champ, he needs a good chocobo. What better racer than Choco?  
Squall: That's it, I'll steal Choco!  
Cloud: No! Choco's mine!  
  
A dramatic fight ensues.  
  
Squall: Die, bastard! I summon the almighty power of Eden!  
Cloud: Almighty, my ass. I call upon the even MORE almighty power of the KNIGHTS OF THE ROUND materia! Combined with W-Summon, Quadra magic, and MP absorb, I'll deal almost 900,000 points of damage!  
Squall: Noooooooooooo.......  
  
After the battle...  
Skeleto: Squall, you suck! How could you get beaten by a guy from a game years older than you?!  
Squall: But that combo was so strong...  
Skeleto: I don't care! You have to win! Here, use this.  
Squall: Thanks! Hey Cloud, I wanna fight again!  
  
A new battle...  
  
Cloud: This again? Oh well. Knights of the Round combo, attack!  
Squall: Not so fast! I'm using this! A Holy War! Making me invincible!  
Cloud: No! Those damn programmers, they gave FFVIII invincibility items! I'm so vulnerable!  
Squall: Eden! Attack!  
  
Squall: Finally, I have won! Choco is mine! Time to train!  
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	2. Freedom!

Chapter 2: Freedom!  
  
3 days later...  
Squall: Ah, you fuckin' chocobo! Run! You suck!  
Choco: That's it! I can't take this anymore!  
Squall: You can talk!  
Choco: Yes, I can talk!  
Squall: How come you never talked to me or Cloud before?  
Choco: I never had to talk to Cloud! He always treated me well! That's why he's a champ! I like him! I hate you though! You're the most incompetent piece of crap trainer I've ever seen!  
Squall: I am not! Now you run, or...or...or you'll be sorry.  
Choco: Good comeback, "puberty boy".  
Squall: What did you call me?  
Choco: Oh, nothing.  
Squall: Well, it doesn't matter! You're one dead bird!  
Choco: I'll fight you for my freedom!  
Squall: Fine! I may not have that Holy war, but I can beat a bird!  
  
Yet another battle...  
  
Squall: Ha! I've been witing for this! Renzokuken!  
Choco: So what! I'm faster than you!  
Squall: How di you dodge that?!  
Choco: You'll never find out! I call upon my fellow Chocobos to attack!  
Squall: Not again! Noooooooooo.......  
  
Skeleto: Hi everyone, I'm back again, time to lecture Squall!  
Squall: Oh, no. Now I get to be yelled at by a skeleton. Whoop-de-do.  
Skeleto: Watch it. I'm the author, and I have complete and utter authority over you until this is over!  
Squall: Prove it.  
Skeleto: Fine. I'll turn you into....Yuffie!  
Squall: Who?  
Skeleto: From FFVII! The annoying one!  
Squall: Ah, God! For the third time today.......Nooooooooo......  
Squall (now Yuffie): Hey, I like my body. Ahh! I'm a chick!  
Skeleto: Of course. That's what Yuffie is. A 16-year old theif.  
Yuffie: Turn me back, please! I can't live like this! I'll do whatever you say!  
Skeleto: Fine, but if you break your promise, I'll turn you into someting much worse.  
Squall: What?  
Skeleto: Seifer.  
Squall: Ahhhhhh! No, don't!  
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	3. Anoter Theft, and the Regionals!

Chapter 3: Anoter Theft, and the Regionals!  
  
Back at the Chocobo Ranch...  
Cloud: I'm so glad you're back! Just in time for the reigonals!  
Mystery Person: Not so fast!  
Cloud: Who are you!  
Zell: It's me, Zell!  
Cloud: Skeleto said you weren't in this story!  
Skeleto: Eh. I got bored and put him back in.  
Cloud: So why are you here?  
Zell: Since Squall stole all my hot dogs, and I need food, I decided to steal Choco, win the regionals, and use the prize money to buy hot dogs!  
Cloud: Not you too! You're not getting Choco!  
Zell: Yes I will. *punches Cloud, knocking him out*  
Zell: Yes! Choco is mine! Come along, little chocobo...  
  
Day of the regional champoinship  
  
Cloud: Why did Zell take my Choco?! Now I can't race! At least I won't lose my title...  
Announcer: And now, welcom the newest rider....Zell Dincht! Riding as number 5, this Balamb native is new to the Chocobo Racing scene.  
Cloud: There he is! There's the bastard! But it's too late to stop him....  
  
After the race  
Announcer: Wow, that was some race! With a come-from-behind victory, Zell Dincht, the newcomer, is the new regional champ!  
Cloud: Choco! Why did you let him win?  
Choco: Sorry, but he treated me so well! He fed me hot dog flavored greens, and now I'm faster than ever! Sorry Cloud, but Zell is my new owner!  
Cloud: I can't believe it. I just lost the only chocobo I ever owned.  
Squall: Join the club.  
  
  
How was it? Review away! Remember, no flaming. I'll try to think of some more chapters soon! 


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